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There are just times that I can't help to vent out

My emotions sometimes get the best of me and that is when I am more open about my life. You see, when I talk about being open, that usually include a little of everything. I don't like to cover up. I just want to be more natural and since I am only human with emotions, surely I make mistakes. I like to be more upfront with people. After all, life is not complete without both the bad and the good. I am simply sharing what life is like with me that I constantly deal with people that think just the opposite of how I think. Their logic is much too different than mine and I struggle with what to do and how to get through to them. I am always left explaining and defending myself to make my point. Why is it that it matters for me to treat others the way they want to be treated, when it doesn't matter how they treat me? That is my problem because things can only go one way or no way. Who is to say they are right anyway? As an individual, each of us should be able to do what we please. What gives them the authority and right to judge others? Tell other people what to do and how to live?
In life, we should be more accepting and not worry about what others have and what others do. We should simply mind our own business and keep doing what we do. Live and let live. There are no rules to follow because we are the only ones that know what is best for us and for people around us that might be affected by our actions. If it is a matter of being fair, as far as I am concerned, I will be fair if to say I am giving money in general as spending money. When it comes to helping people I help those in need and not give everyone equal amount of money because I am worried that one might feel left out. For goodness sake...that is utterly silly. I don't see it that way. I will only see it that way if to say I am giving money just for the sake of giving money away, like on birthdays or holidays. If I am helping my father pay his debts, then, that is because he has debts to pay and not because I am giving him money to spend while I left my mother out-didn't give her money to spend. That is where my family back home is missing the point.
It would be like if my father had an accident and I needed to give him money. Well, will I need to give my mother the same amount of money, too, just so I am being fair? Instead of covering for one problem, I am covering for two. So, that is ridiculous. I am only being helpful but instead it is not doing any good but bad because all I get is problem-the kinds of problems that I don't need. So, yep, that is what gets me with my people back home. I can't do anything without one of them feeling left out...LOL. Oh...can I ever do anything right on my own, if people think like that? That is the downside with the people where I am from. I have to watch what I do or say; otherwise I am condemned, judged, unfair, no good, etc. I love my family back home but when they think and act like they do, I am disappointed.

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1 comments:

daisy said...

hi Ana! bisita na man ko dri. kapait sang imo storya. i hope everything will be settled soon with your family nga di na sila magselos selos. tsk tsk

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